Geoff, you nailed it. The more light you carry, the more the moths—and mosquitoes—show up. Blocking isn’t weakness, it’s spiritual hygiene. Trolls are just unconscious evangelists for your evolution. Keep disrupting.
I love the idea of quickly reframing. I have been dealing with an ongoing conversation with a family member that is so draining and pointless. I think I've succeeded in ending it (the conversation), but I haven't yet thought through a positive reason as to why I am being targeted. That would help. At the moment, I'm just so full of trying to understand an incomprehensible point of view. Which is really a waste of time, as you said. It's exhausting and goes nowhere, whereas figuring out how to think of myself as a person who is pulling some weight if I'm encountering resistance, is kinda nice.
Thanks for this excellent take on dealing with unwell people.
'There’s absolutely no future in you relating or talking with them. READ that again.'
I have to take a bit of exception with this and say 'it depends'. Obviously I can only speak for myself, but I had an interaction with a bully who turned out to be just a very unwell, but open, person. He was really attacking me as viciously as he could, telling me my writing was garbage and I was full of shit and so on. I sorr of just rolled with it and kept responding in a loving way. Not sure why. But anyway at one point he said 'you're just a narcissist! I was raised by one, I know em when I see em!'.
That stuck me, and I responded by saying 'that must have been painful. I can relate.'
I swear you could hear the guy tear up through the text box. He suddenly turned apologetic, and we finished up in pleasant fashion.
All that is to say if someone is being abusive, everyone should make their own calls. But for whatever reason, that day it turned out alright (and he had very well honed troll skills believe me, he was hitting below the belt and I had to do a good bit of mindfulness breathing just to read the next thing..but I was curious, too, because I couldn't quite figure out WHY all that hate was flying and somehow I knew it wasn't about me).
It was a pleasant surprise. But then again these unwell people can be quite abusive and even dangerous (if they latch on to personal info doxxing is a real danger, especially if they are a psycho influencer with a rabid following), so I am definitely not giving advice either way. It really depends. I think I had a feeling this guy was in pain and not %that% toxic. 😁
Geoff, your 5-point plan is on target. Trolls aren’t just noise. They’re often the cost of showing up and standing tall. It’s easy to say “don’t engage,” but your method of 𝘧𝘭𝘪𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 -shifting from frustration to intentional gratitude and bold action - resonates deeply.
When you meet malice with clarity and love (and a firm block), it starves the trolls of the attention they crave while strengthening your own resolve.
Thanks for the reminder that dreams deserve protection, not contamination. I’m in.
Omgosh yesssss! I made the mistake & replied to a troll then told friends. I should have just blocked & not engaged. I knew it was a troll. No followers, no name, no photo. But still, my instincts to defend me kicked in.
Good for you Maryellen.. Ignoring bad behavior is always a good place to begin, taking a few deep breaths etc... It is so tempting though! Keep being amazing friend, your voice matters
Is it irony when I just visited the meany’s page and they posted this article. Now I’m laughing. Because the shit they said was mean AF.
Off to block the asshole.
Geoff, you nailed it. The more light you carry, the more the moths—and mosquitoes—show up. Blocking isn’t weakness, it’s spiritual hygiene. Trolls are just unconscious evangelists for your evolution. Keep disrupting.
i agree… spiritual hygiene… such a good phrase
Love this, Geoff. Thank you for sharing.
Is there a case to report trolls, it’s always a dilemma to me when such occurs?
#4 in your 5-point plan is a great suggestion!
thank you Joshua, very kind
I love the idea of quickly reframing. I have been dealing with an ongoing conversation with a family member that is so draining and pointless. I think I've succeeded in ending it (the conversation), but I haven't yet thought through a positive reason as to why I am being targeted. That would help. At the moment, I'm just so full of trying to understand an incomprehensible point of view. Which is really a waste of time, as you said. It's exhausting and goes nowhere, whereas figuring out how to think of myself as a person who is pulling some weight if I'm encountering resistance, is kinda nice.
So thanks.
focus on those who really value you and fill up your cup
Thanks for this excellent take on dealing with unwell people.
'There’s absolutely no future in you relating or talking with them. READ that again.'
I have to take a bit of exception with this and say 'it depends'. Obviously I can only speak for myself, but I had an interaction with a bully who turned out to be just a very unwell, but open, person. He was really attacking me as viciously as he could, telling me my writing was garbage and I was full of shit and so on. I sorr of just rolled with it and kept responding in a loving way. Not sure why. But anyway at one point he said 'you're just a narcissist! I was raised by one, I know em when I see em!'.
That stuck me, and I responded by saying 'that must have been painful. I can relate.'
I swear you could hear the guy tear up through the text box. He suddenly turned apologetic, and we finished up in pleasant fashion.
All that is to say if someone is being abusive, everyone should make their own calls. But for whatever reason, that day it turned out alright (and he had very well honed troll skills believe me, he was hitting below the belt and I had to do a good bit of mindfulness breathing just to read the next thing..but I was curious, too, because I couldn't quite figure out WHY all that hate was flying and somehow I knew it wasn't about me).
it's true, when you make a rule, there are always exceptions to be made... great story!
It was a pleasant surprise. But then again these unwell people can be quite abusive and even dangerous (if they latch on to personal info doxxing is a real danger, especially if they are a psycho influencer with a rabid following), so I am definitely not giving advice either way. It really depends. I think I had a feeling this guy was in pain and not %that% toxic. 😁
Geoff, your 5-point plan is on target. Trolls aren’t just noise. They’re often the cost of showing up and standing tall. It’s easy to say “don’t engage,” but your method of 𝘧𝘭𝘪𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 -shifting from frustration to intentional gratitude and bold action - resonates deeply.
When you meet malice with clarity and love (and a firm block), it starves the trolls of the attention they crave while strengthening your own resolve.
Thanks for the reminder that dreams deserve protection, not contamination. I’m in.
that's awesome... thank you for those kind words Michael.. solidarity is important
“You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.”
If Churchill can stand up to fascism, surely we can survive online trolls.
so true... online trolls... nothing... love it Jon. Nice frame
Trolls abhor being ignored - it’s their kryptonite.
it totally is
Omgosh yesssss! I made the mistake & replied to a troll then told friends. I should have just blocked & not engaged. I knew it was a troll. No followers, no name, no photo. But still, my instincts to defend me kicked in.
This is a fantastic plan.
Good for you Maryellen.. Ignoring bad behavior is always a good place to begin, taking a few deep breaths etc... It is so tempting though! Keep being amazing friend, your voice matters
Thanks Geoff. I like your plan. Next time, breathe & block. I will definitely remember you for this one. 🙌
welcome